Catharsis

So my car got stuck in the middle of the massive snow drift that formed in my driveway last night. A massive snow drift that formed in the MIDDLE OF F***ING APRIL!!! What in the flying f**k is going on? F**ing asshole f**ing sh**-faced wind! Do you know there are places on this earth where winds are refreshing summer breezes that cool you on a hot day? Did you know that? I wouldn't know that. The only thing I've ever known of wind is that it's a vicious soul-sucking b***h. It's an oppressor! That's right, the wind is The Man, and all it's doing is trying to keep me and my brothas down. Well that s*** don't pop, homey! I got da mind to pop a cap in its windy ass, know what I'm sayin'? I'm going Boston Tea Party all up in here! That's right, me and my crew are rolling up on the Wind's boat and dumping it's wacky-ass tea all into the ocean. You wanna tax me? All you're taxing is my patience, you stupid-ass British colonial wind! God! That's right! S*** is on! Half nelson, fool! Y'all facing my half-nelson! Never been beaten! You better be IN IT TO WIN IT, 'cause I'ma BRING IT ON, yo!

Regular posting will resume tomorrow after the writer goes home and has a good cry.