A step up in the world

My superheroism has finally been noticed. The superhero council decided I, Dung Beetle Guy, am capable of handling a bigger community. I'm off to the big city of North Battleford, but don't worry too much Rocky. The Blog remains behind to remove all villainous activity from your streets.

I received the letter just moments after my fifth bad guy capture. He was a slow dim-witted kid, who was trying to steal some five-cent candies from Pudgies.

I did the usual punch to the face, leg sweep and pounce that I do on all my under-ten-year-old evil doers. This one sure knew how to cry. Snot running out of his nose, and tears streaming down his rosy red cheeks. He was sobbing so hard I thought he was having an asthma attack, so I hit him in the stomach again.

After a trip to the police station, where I pressed charges against the little twerp, his mother showed up.

"You can't be going around beating up little kids," she said. "Are you some kind of monster? Who the hell does that?"

"Oh no, no need for thanks," I reply. They're always thankful when I squash crime. "It's all in a days work for Dung Beetle Guy."

"Are you even listening? Officer I'd like to press charges against him," she tells the police.

"Mam, that's enough. I can't take anymore praise. It's just too much," I retort. She just won't stop with all the kind words. It's starting to get a little ridiculous. I know I'm a super duper hero, and I have more important stuff to take care of.

She keeps ranting. "Dung Beetle Guy is so great, how can I ever repay you, blabby blab blab," is all I hear as I walk out the front door.

It's time to stop another crime

Kick ass.