Yes, I am drunk!

Where has Dung Beetle Guy gotten to? I know that’s the question everyone is asking.
Well he’s been too busy saving North Battleford from evil to write about his exploits on this blog.
He’s been fighting gigantuan killer bees and saving the local citizens from a herpes epidemic. (Thanks for coming to the Battlefords Joel.)
But one day, it wasn’t unlike any of the other 364 days of the year , Dung Beetle Guy had a problem.
It was with a eight-year-old boy. He wouldn’t let little Sally have the ball. She was up to bat at kick ball. He was being a jerk.
It was the early morning recess and Dung Beetle Guy was on the playground making sure everyone was playing nice.
I grabbed the boy by the collar.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” I asked the kid. The rage was starting to build.
I heard the sounds of LFO in the background. I flashed back to 2000.
“LFO, LFO,” said Dane.
“Where the fuck do you get that from?” inquired Joel. The pair were living together in a two-bedroom apartment on Frobisher BLVD.
“It’s on the CD. Just listen to it,” Dane replys.
The duo continue playing video games.
Joel is extremely cheap. He only know a few moves.
“Quit fucking playing cheap,” Dane yells at Joel.
“Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, I’m the sexiest man alive,” Joel responds, for I am a SAIT student and only the hottest guys make it there.”
“Screw you and your sexy ways. I quit.” dane stands up and gently places his PS2 controller on the ground.
Joel stands up and pushes Dane. “You can’t quit now. I’m just about to win.”
“Fuck you!”
The two wrestle around on the ground. Dane finally has Joel by the collar and is rattling his head back and forth.
Dung Beetle Guy snaps back to reality. He has the little boy and is shaking him like a little rag doll.
“I hate you Joel!” Dung Beetle Guy yells at the kid.
A teacher runs over to save the boy, but only receives a punch to the face for the effort.
In a rage Dung Beetle Guy kicks two other little kids in the head before hightailing it home.


The pain, the pain. I can’t take it anymore. Why me? Why me?
Dung Beetle Guy has finally met his arch nemesis. I know you’re all thinking. What could even hurt the great DBG?
Well it’s a sunburn to the top of the foot.
Damn does that ever hurt. It hurts so bad. I can hardly bare the pain. Why won’t it just leave me alone?
OUCH!.