The Gangster of Love

What would you do if you were shoved off to jail for 10 years for a crime you didn't commit? How many pushups would you do? How would you arrange your cell? Would you get - or be - a prison bitch? Man, all I know is that after 10 years in prison, one would be eating steel and pissing nails. And if this one that I'm alluding to used to be a Yakuza enforcer who willingly took the fall concerning the murder of his boss, then we should have a surefire recipe for badassery!

Well, according to Yakuza, the new PS2 game by Sega... maybe not.


You see, when one picks up a game like this, with the big fat M-Rating on the box, one expects certain things. One expects to see asses being kicked. One expects to see hot girls in various states of undress. One, in general, expects to feel like an all-around concrete-eating asphalt-shitting hardass. What one DOESN'T expect to see is a mission titled, of all things, "Save The Puppy!"

Yep.

Save The Puppy.

This is not a slang term for anything. You actually have to run to a store and buy dog food to feed a sick puppy.

...

Screw it, this is the best game ever!